I have been thinking about how I will talk about Santa Claus to any future children of mine. I think I may teach my children about the real Nicholas, Bishop of Myra. He is a model of giving and that would prevent my children from being snobs whose only knowledge of Santa Claus is that he is a lie his friend’s parents tell. On the other hand, I don’t want to be the one who lies about Santa Claus only to have to figure out how to explain why I lied about Santa but why Jesus is real.
Is there anyone out there who has crossed this road before as a parent? I have a few years to think about it but I’d like to hear your stories/thoughts.
Related: Mark Driscoll talks about the real Saint Nicholas here.
Related: “Is Santa Claus Real? A Parent’s Epistemological Meditation” by Richard Beck
December 15, 2009 at 7:07 pm
This is one thing I have come to hate about Christmas. I have four young kids, two of whom are old enough to get it and we are very careful about how we talk about Santa. Not because we are afraid of ruining this silly story for them, but because I don’t want them to ruin it for someone else. The last thing I want is some parent barking on the phone about what my kid told theirs. When our daughter (4, almost 5) asks about some aspect of Santa, we usually respond with “well that what the story says,” trying always to cast him as a fictional character. We counter that by reminding her about Jesus’ birth and that getting presents is fine, but that’s not the point of the holiday. I so want to blurt out “HE’S NOT REAL!!!!!”
December 15, 2009 at 8:26 pm
Rereading my post, I see how the last statement about blurting “He’s not real” could be misunderstood as applying to Jesus! For the record–that statement applies to Santa! I believe in Jesus!
December 15, 2009 at 8:33 pm
I plan to teach my future kids about the real Saint Nick.
But in other news, our children’s ministry had Santa visit us on Sunday and lo and behold, Santa Claus read to us the actual story of Saint Nick. I planned it that way.
December 16, 2009 at 9:24 pm
I understood! It is one of the most annoying social taboos to have to silently affirm the possibility of Santa’s existence b/c some parent somewhere will get really upset if you tell their child otherwise.
December 16, 2009 at 9:24 pm
That’s a cool idea!
December 23, 2009 at 5:01 pm
Hey Brian,
Nice stopping in to take a read
I thought I’d throw in my two cents. My family no longer has Christmas stockings on Christmas. When I was about seven or eight, my parents started the tradition of celebrating St. Nicholas Day as a family. Prior to that, I had a basic understanding that Santa wasn’t real, but we did learn the generic Santa story and could relate to other kids in that sense…
When my mom began teaching us about Nicholas and his life and legacy, it became an explanation of the Real “Santa” and the historic origins on which the modern myth is based. (In some sense, I suppose it can be a pretty meaningful tool to teach that even the true story of Christ can and has become misrepresented in parts of modern “Christian” culture.)
Over the years, my brothers and I learned much from the stories of character and faith of Nicholas’ life, and each December 6th, we still get stockings from my mom with the traditional gifts. (Something warm to wear, something made of wood, something good to eat, and money: each symbolic of different aspects of his story and testimony.) She used to mail them to us at college, and now she gives them to spouses and significant others, too.
My parent’s motivations for teaching us differently were much the same as the ones you’ve outlined — they never lied to us about the Easter bunny or the tooth fairy or Santa Clause because they didn’t want to be in the position of having to convince us that Jesus wasn’t fake as well.
It’s a peaceful way to acknowledge the Santa tradition without warring against culture at Christmastime and to give children the respectable explanation they deserve while also clearing the calendar after December 6th to focus more specifically on the story of Christ.
We don’t have kids yet, but Ted and I plan to adopt the same traditions with them. In the meantime, I’m still quite glad to receive new *actual* socks, wooden kitchen utensils, oranges, and gold coins (well, chocolate gold coins, for the record) at St. Nicholas Day and to hear his stories of humble, merciful Christian living and to simply skip one more holiday tradition of stuffing random gifts into giant gift bags hanging from the mantle.
December 26, 2009 at 8:15 am
Thanks for sharing this. I am thinking along the same lines. Celebrating St. Nick’s Day is a great idea. I will have to read more about the historical Nicholas in order to prepare myself to develop a similar tradition.